Arranged Marriage
Arranged Marriage
The common types of marriages include the arranged marriage and the love marriage. Traditionally, marriage was seen as an institution aimed at bringing two people together in order to start their own family. A long lasting marriage was said to undergo successful development. People have different customs and traditions which they use in developing societal setting for marriage. India is a good example of those countries where arranged marriage has dominated for years. Research shows that the Indian set up of the society structure focus on family values. An individual’s choice comes after family values thus it is a society where marriage is a society thing. Unlike in old days, most people are against the arranged marriage because it has its disadvantages. Most people prefer love marriage where an individual selects his or her life partner, (Riedmann & Strahm, 2012).
Be it arranged marriage or love marriage, individuals should know that they both have negative and positive sides. We have countries where arranged marriage is compulsory for those intend to marry while in other countries, individuals are given the freedom to choose their life partners. Some of the countries, where arranged marriage is a must include China, India, Japan, and Pakistan. In such countries, family values come first making it impossible for individuals to socialize. It is the conservative mind and respect for elders has given way for the arranged marriage. According to traditions of these countries, women belong to the house thus they mostly stay in home environs. On the same note, they are not allowed to move anyhow in the society. This makes it difficult to get the groom hence leads to arranged marriage, (Divakaruni, 2011).
Individuals in need of getting married must comply with elder’s decision. Simply because, young men and women have no time to look for their partners, it is required that elders decision accepted and respected accordingly. In arranged marriage, the bride and the groom stay without seeing each other until the wedding day. This is different with love marriage simply because in this case the bride and the groom always meet and exchange ideas. Arranged marriage prevents couple from knowing and understanding each other from the beginning. It is a condition that creates problems in marriage and those who mostly suffer are women because they had no choice on who to marry. One of disadvantage with arranged marriage is that both couple must come from the same nationality and mostly tribe, (Fish, 2010).
Love marriage commonly practiced by the westerners give couples the freedom to choose partners who will support them in their life stay. Apart from having the western influence, the current generation has a positive thought towards love marriage compared to arranged marriage. The advantage with love marriage over arranged marriage is that couples get opportunities to learn each other. Although love marriage gives couple opportunity to choose each other, it does not consider elder’s decision on the marriage thing. Elder’s advice is important simply because it helps individuals have a positive direction towards their life expectations. Love marriage helps couples know expectations of each other hence determine whether to marry or to leave for another partner, (Browne, 2011).
Arranged marriage gives individuals easy time because the issue of looking for the best partner is left and shared by parents of both sides. It is a convenient way of marriage because it guarantees an individual on having a marriage partner. Although the partner may be not one desired, individuals tend to get someone to live with. Unlike in love marriage where couple may stay for long before getting married, arranged married may take few months and the entire thing ends. Parents in arranged marriage always pray for their children to get right partners in order to start their families. Arrange marriage system is good in preventing divorce activities. Parents participate in motion situations thus they reduce the rate of divorce activities in the modern marriage system (love marriage), (Uberoi, 2000).
Marriage love does not give maximum love towards couple. In the first place, they don’t know each other thus they tend to fear socializing and sharing what they have. An individual may have love towards another person, but simply the partner has been chosen the other party has to comply with elder’s decisions. Arranged marriage prevents individuals have love marriage because selection of partners falls under parents decision. Learning each other in arranged marriage take significant time that may waste couples best time and may at the end divorce for they don’t understand each other. Although divorce in arranged marriage does not occur, when it occurs individuals are disowned by the parents and gets no respect from the community, (Fish, 2010).
It is true that individuals should stick with the marriage they prefer simply because no sure shot rules that governs a successful marriage. It all depends with how couples take each other and the level of understanding.
Reference:
Browne, K. (2011). An Introduction to Sociology: Polity
Divakaruni, C. (2011). Arranged Marriage: Trnsworld
Fish, J. M. (2010). Arranged Marriages: Looking in the Cultural Mirror. Retrieved from, http://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/looking-in-the-cultural-mirror/201004/arranged-marriages, On October 11, 2012
Riedmann, A. & Strahm, A. (2012). Marriages, Families, and Relationships: Making Choices in a Diverse Society
Uberoi, P. (2000). Family, Kinship, and Marriage in India. in: Encyclopædia Britannica
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