Dying, Death, and Bereavement: A Challenge for Living
Question 1. Discuss how the media have influenced our perceptions of life and death.
Media in the form of magazines, newspapers, TV, books and movies are another way from which people can learn about death (12). In the news from these media there are collections of catastrophes, suicides, murders, and disasters. Most of the time, reports of catastrophes relating to death rarely do justice to the majority of the population, nonetheless, this reports centralize the event of grief for a nation or society (13). For national incidents, the public is converged to contemplate the meaning of such grieves. In other instances, media illegitimately intrudes the privacy of the believed with journalists approaches causing more trauma to the bereaved and amplifies the pain. Media also fails to present the complete picture of the reaction of humans to death due to tight program schedules.
Question 2: Brainstorm how parents, teachers, and other adults can create teachable moments with respect to death education
To children, death can be loss of relation or pet. Communicating to children about death topics should not be held back and lots of honesty should be incorporated (14). Introducing the topic of a close death before the discussion of death to a child worsens the perception of the topic to the child. In addition, appropriate explanations to the child’s situation should use language set in such a way that the child understands especially using guides within the child’s interest and understanding capability (14). The best way is to use metaphorical understanding while taking care of the child’s literal mindedness to avoid mixing fantasy with literal details in the message. Lastly, it is important to verify what we think we have told them to avoid inconsistencies.
Question 3: When should a person be considered dead? How should death be determined? EEGs have been used to assess the presence of brain waves. If a person shows a flat EEG (absence of brain waves) for 24 hours, should that person be considered dead?
A person should be considered dead when someone has witnessed them die especially caregivers, doctors or even a family member if death occurs at home. The deceased ceases to live and their live in the world comes to an end (11). The determination of death should be by identifying the dead person and communicating the information to the deceased’s family. Flat Electroencephalography is a sign of brain death except for hypothermia and the depression of CNS. EEG mainly used in cases of distinguishing epileptic seizures from spells like migraine variants or for patients with comas prognostication. It can also be used to monitor the functioning of brain in intensive care unit.
Question 4: Suppose your doctor has determined that you have an illness with an absolute certainty that you will be dead in two years. Answer the following questions: Would you want your doctor to tell you right away? If yes, how would you want your doctor to provide the information? If not, how long would you want your doctor to wait? Should the doctor inform one of your family members in the meantime?
Yes. I would like to be told right away. To provide such information to me, the doctor should present the information to me using euphemisms, metaphors and slang which are communicated humorously to express the deeper meaning (14). No harsh words should be used with harshness in order to mask reality but this does not necessarily mean denying death or avoid talking about it. In addition, the doctor can incorporate non verbal communications which include the tone of voice and the rate of speech which do not contrast my perception or understanding. This will work more in enlightening my judgments based on effective communication. I would then value the message and decide whether or not to inform my parents.
Question 5: Interview a person 70 or older. Interviews can include the following questions (make a good story for that one) what were funerals like in the 1930s and 1940s? How have funerals changed over the past forty or fifty years? What suggestions do you have about contemporary funerals?
In the 1930’s funerals had traditions like whether or not the corpse is in the coffin, they should be carried legs first and this went unsaid as it was viewed as familiar to all. There were places where the bereaved would be kept in a coffin and buried without to allow the coffin is reused.
Furthermore, funeral services were to be held out in the churchyard and not at the gravesite as is today. Like today, the coffin was opened for people to pay last respect and unlike today, it was the undertaker who screwed it closed. Carrying the corpse legs first is still a practice today. For the last forty years, most communities have taken up cremation and the funeral ceremony occurs in the crematorium chapel not the deceased church. Recently, most churches like the Anglican and Catholics burry the deceased including a representation of what they did while alive, like including a bible in the coffin in case of a nun or priest among others. Wearing black clothes is still significant in funerals today (20).
My view
My feelings about death during my childhood were somewhat not integrated within the context of growth meant to occur in the bereaved life especially with the mourning that came with it. I wondered the reason for summoning the extended family and involving the community. More still, the tears that were shed at the gravesite as the deceased was buried in the ground. As I grew older in my adolescence life, these and more questions I had were slowly answered. I encountered death when my pet died from an accident. I felt like taking a banner written on it “I am a person who has lost their beloved pet.”
I felt I needed help which I couldn’t tell from where. I cried endlessly and remained in sadness, loneliness and sorrow for days. I felt so guilty and angry but this was too late. For the first time I sought for consolation from my parents and friends and I understood the reason for having the community join hands with the family to share the circumstance. I couldn’t believe the disjointed bonds that resulted from his burial in a pit dug at one corner of out compound and I used to visit the grave every week with a flower to symbolize my love for him.
Reference
Corless, L., & Pittman, M., (2003). Dying, Death, and Bereavement: A Challenge for Living.Springer Publishing Company, Inc. New York: NY.
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