Peer Review
Here is a peer review from Sedaris concerning an essay written by my classmate. In his work he wished to also write a peer review of another work but from my own observation he got it wrong if we consider the rules which must be followed in the writing of a peer review. I would very much wish to correct him for show him some of the conspicuous mistakes he may have committed in his work.
The organization of the paper is wanting. There should have been an introductory paragraph aiming at showing us what the author intent to write about in the entire paper. Unfortunately that paragraph is missing. If it is there it is mixed with the body of the documents which makes it hard to differentiate the two. The author does not mention the title of the article. He has a point to argue about but he lacks the details to expound on it. Therefore we remain wondering what exactly he wished to talk about.
We take the first feel sentences to be the introductory paragraph. In this paragraph the author doesn’t connect word well. For example he touches on the use of humor and sarcasm but he tells us little on how the two are used. Clearly there is no clear connection about how the sarcasm is used in the entire context. He asks many questions about the essay instead of proving answers to it.
Instead of giving answerless questions he should have maneuvered to find how to address the issues he would have liked to bring into attention.
The writer has an argument. He argues about how people judge others on observing others in different situations. He wishes to show how people end up loving or hating one other after seeing one another. The writer expresses sedan as a guy who disliked other people when he met them basing his point on the way he says he ended up hating others more when he observed his own pretense.
The writer shows that there was use of humor in the context where he used it to draw the attention of people reading it into more serious discussions or observations in the context of the essay.Since there is an argument to make the writer should have a way of moving forward with it. Here is a suggestion of moving forward with the argument of humor usage to draw attention of the people as well as the reasons for judgment of people by their friends.
He should connect the words well first and give some clear examples of how the humor is used to draw the attention. He should also try to show how judgment is arrived at by individuals on others.There is a bit of support from the text fro example the writer quotes some phrase. These quotes are not well placed in the essay. They therefore don’t let the reader understand what the writer was up to. The writer should give more information about the quotes and give more explanation to help the reader understand the context of the essay by himself. The work should also be well cited to make sure that one can go and look for the information later for more clarification if need be.
In the introductory paragraph there must be introduction to help the reader know what he expects to get inside the paper. He should have been very clear to explain how the humor is seen in the article as well as the argument about the judgmental behaviors on individuals on others.
If there was clarity in the entire text it would be easier for the reader to connect what the writer is talking about. There should be clear sentence construction and the work should be well organized.Good development of work will mean that lead to less time in trying to understand the work which will be very beneficial.
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