Resolving Conflicts in a Relationship

Conflicts have become common in any relationship and most of the counselors do not know to resolve the problems. For instance, conflicts are common among married couples, friends. They are also common between parents and children. A large percentage of counselors do not know how to handle such conflicts. This topic is aimed at educating counselors on how to resolve conflicts in marriage or any other place. It also helps them know the steps to follow when resolving conflict and how to build good relationship with the client. Hence, the reason I have chosen the topic. This topic outlines the various steps counselors should follow when resolving conflicts. First, the counselors should identify the cause of the conflict. There are various causes of conflicts in a relationship. For instance, conflicts can be caused by not being competent. In addition, conflicts can result when one part tries to win the approval of the other part. It can also result when a part fears intimacy with another person. Additionally, conflict can result when a person does not meet the needs of the client. Lastly, the conflict can result when one meets someone who reminds him of conflicts that have not been resolved. In this case, the counselor should help the client understand what caused the conflict. This will make it easy to solve the conflict. The next step in resolving conflicts is determining the origin of the conflict. The counselor should look for the resistance of power and control between the parties. In addition, the counselor should determine if there is need to be accepted and issues of enmeshment (Kottler &Shepard, 2007).


The third step is increasing the pain. The counselor should increase the clients’ pain so as to enable the client to take constructive risk   that he would have avoided. In most cases, the counselors force clients to identify some features of themselves that are not good. The fourth step is taking responsibility. The counselor should encourage the client to take his or her responsibility without blaming other people. The counselor should confront the client for not taking the right action. The fifth step is helping the client to improve his confidence by creating the right relationship. Lastly, the counselor should help the client try other ways in the relationship (Kottler &Shepard, 2007).


The topic outlines how to develop a positive relationship between the client and counselor. Building a good relationship between the client and counselor is important in counseling. Most counselors do not give the client time to adjust to the environment, but they are quick to solve the problem. There are various factors that should be present in a therapeutic relationship so as to help the client develop the right environment. First, the two parties should be committed. The counselor and the clients should be honest with each other. For example, the two should stick to the rules established. Additionally, there should be trust between the parties. The counselor should offer interpersonal conditions to the person being counseled so as to build trust. Another factor is Empathy. The counselor should be able to understand the client from his perspective. The counselor should communicate well to ensure important issues are explored. The counselor should encourage exchange of statements from the client and responses from the counselor. The counselor should be able to maintain confidentiality so as to enhance the relationship. Confidentiality helps maintain safety and clients’ privacy. Lastly, the counselor should be able to apply power and expertise so as help the client discover himself and change (Kottler &Shepard, 2007).


Reference

Kottler,J.A.,&Shepard,D.S.(2007).Introduction to counseling. Voices from the field.Cengage Learning





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